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Dear Sue


Dear Sue,

I am currently in a steady relationship with a guy that I like. It’s only been recently that my boyfriend has noticed that a good friend of mine and I have been really friendly toward each other. And by really friendly I mean almost to the point of flirting. My question is, would this type of flirting be considered cheating?

That is a very interesting. My first question to you is what you would consider flirting to be. Now-a-days most people considered flirting as a friendly gesture towards somebody with the intent of either hooking up or starting a relationship with somebody, however I don’t think that this is always the case. Sometimes people can be flirtatious with each other because of how close of a bond they have towards each other. My only warning about flirting with the opposite gender is to make sure that both parties have to come to an understanding that this type of flirting is not going to lead to something, cause most of the time flirting with somebody tends to be a sign of interest to date.

Now in terms of if this is considered cheating it’s up to what you and your partner agree to what cheating is. The term cheating comes from the concept of a breakage in trust between two people. So my thought for you would be how do you define cheating. Because sometimes cheating is not always the extreme form of it, as in sleeping with somebody. Sometimes cheating could be the simple act of planning to date somebody else. My best advice is to ask yourself and your partner what both of you consider cheating to be. Hope this helps.