Written by Shamira James
It’s nearing the end of the year here at RC, if you you couldn’t tell by the warmer weather, the anticipation of finals and the increased amount of people walking their dogs on campus. If you couldn’t figure it out from that, you can tell by looking around at the student body. This time of year, everyone is showing the effects of the past semesters, some more than others. Here is a list of a few archetypes you can find on campus this spring.
Hot Mess Express: Characterized by losing ALL of their assignments, always showing up late to class and forgoing most necessary hygiene habits. Usually seen wearing the same stained sweats while running haphazardly in and out of Cavern and taking up temporary residence in the 24-hour room in the library. Never seen without a HUGE mug of coffee.
Previously-Thought-Dead: They’re the ones who you didn’t even know were in your class, because ever since syllabus week, they’ve been MIA. And now that the semester is in the home stretch, there they are: honestly, probably doing better in the class than you…and you’ve been there all semester. Honestly, YIKES.
Denial is Not Just a River in Egypt: This student has two research papers, a project proposal, and a presentation due before their lacrosse game, all within the next 48 hours. But don’t worry about them, because they certainly won’t. They’re probably napping right now, trying to ignore the little voice in the back of their head that is telling them to MAYBE start their assignments.
Contact Stresser: Have you ever asked someone “what’s up?” and the other person told you EVERYTHING that’s going wrong in their life, starting with childhood trauma and ending with the looming assignments and projects that are STRESSING THEM OUT, OH MY GOD. And then, after talking to them, you have that nasty feeling of contact stress. Gross.
Suffering from Senioritis: We tried to interview them, but they’re still hungover from the 100 Days Party.