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Ya Hate to See It, Ya Better Not Be It!


Let’s face it: we all have our SMAN that is our Social Media Arch-Nemesis. You know the person: you roll your eyes and scoff any time you see a post from them. They inevitably end up as a screenshot in your pettiest group chat and inside joke between you and the gals. Don’t feel alone, chances are this isn’t the first time their social media antics have made them the bane of anyone’s existence. They are everyone’s SMANs, and it’s probably because they do any of the following things on this list.

  1. Watch that scene, WE DON’T stan the FaceTune queen – get your scoffs out now, everyone knows this person. On IG they have the curves, the abs, the BadgirlRiRi™ thickness, the chiseled jaw and everything else that makes people double-tap till their fingers bleed. The only thing is, that when you see them in person…they are lackluster to say the least. We all know the camera adds 10 pounds, but it most definitely doesn’t add a booty! You’ve been clocked!
  2. BUT FIRST, let me ONLY post a selfie – we get it, a selfie is easier to take, but seriously GIVE SOMEONE ELSE THE CAMERA. Even if there are other people in it, you’re still holding the camera and that’s the issue. It’s just annoying. Put on some big girl or boy panties and ask someone to take a picture of you for once. The next selfie that gets posted is getting reported for being inappropriate.
  3. Serial anniversary spammer – happy 1 month babe! Happy 2 months babe! Happy 3 months babe! Happy 4 months babe! Happy 5 months babe! Happy 6 months babe! WE GET IT! You don’t need a post for it, keep major posts for 6 month intervals and save your weekly updates on your relationship for Snapchat stories, so at least after 24 hours we’ll be spared.
  4. Not your face, not your problem? – this should be an offense punishable by law. Before you post a pic, you GOTTA know the rules! Send it in the group chat and double check with the gang first. If you post a pic and you sister looks busted or your teammate looks a little wonky BUT you look great, that’s not cool and just know that everyone thinks you’re a bad friend.
  5. Up in the Gym Just Workin ON MY LAST NERVE – We get it! You’re up at 5 a.m. pumping iron when everyone else is sleeping. If it ain’t a protein shake you won’t even look at it, your closet is literally all Lulu Lemon and every day you post a disappointingly empty but calorically correct meal. While being a skinnty legend is great, STOP SHOVING YOUR SKINNTY LIFESTYLE IN OUR FACES. You’re driving us away from being your gym buddy and even more so from liking your pics.

Riverfest Promises Food, Fun, Music for a Good Cause


Written by Bradley Bommarito

Next month, RC students, staff, and faculty as well as local community members will have the opportunity to get food and listen to live music while supporting a worthy cause. The Salem Riverfest Concert and Fundraiser will be held from 5:00 to 9:00 p.m. on the Maroon Athletic Quad on Saturday, April 13.

“The event is for the purpose of raising money for the Clean Valley Council (CVC) to help them continue their mission of providing outreach and education for Southwest VA about litter prevention, recycling, and preventing stormwater pollution, as well as sponsoring several litter cleanup events each year,” said junior Aidan Medina, Head Riverfest Manager with the RC Campus Activities Board (CAB).

According to Medina, the main inspiration for the event came when senior Zachary Caveness came forward to propose an event to help promote the health of the James and Roanoke rivers, which have been suffering from pollution and litter as of late.

“We’re receiving aid from various student organizations that have signed up to participate in the event, but we’re partnered with the CVC to reach our goals. Beyond raising awareness and promoting the cause with our event, they’re the ones that we’re trying to help to protect the local ecosystem and continue educating people about how to better serve as stewards for the environment,” said Medina.

Riverfest is Spring 2019’s premier CAB event. It will be bigger in scale than previous events.

“Riverfest is going to be similar to past Springfest events but on a larger scale than we’ve ever done in the past. We’re going to be having three separate bands playing: Kendall Street Company, Audacity Brass Band, and Orange Culture,” said Medina.

In addition to the array of music choices, Riverfest will boast of a variety of options for food and fun.

“We’re going to be having food trucks and a beer garden that we’re sure everyone will enjoy (assuming they’re of legal age). There will be several other attractions, like a bounce castle, a mechanical bull, a climbing wall, and more that people will be able to enjoy,” said Medina.

If all that isn’t enough to pique your interest, you may wish to attend simply because that’s where Commons will be served that evening.

“Dining Services will be serving dinner on the MAQ that evening, and admittance is free to students, faculty and staff, with a suggested donation of five dollars,” said Medina.

Medina encourages people to check out the event if they’re interested in supporting the local environment, or just want to enjoy a Saturday evening with live music, good food, and a beer.

“The cause itself is the environment that we all share. Beyond the fun and the entertainment and the food, we wanted to organize this event in order to help promote the health of the land that we live in. Roanoke College CAB has always had a strong commitment to helping the environment and reducing our impact on the area as much as possible, and we were overjoyed to have a venue that we could use to achieve that while having a good time, raising awareness, and putting on an event that we hope the community will enjoy and remember,” said Medina.

RC Celebrates International Women’s Day


Written by Emily Leclerc

On Tuesday, March 12, Roanoke College hosted a luncheon and forum about women’s sexuality around the globe. “Our Bodies, Ourselves” was organized by the Office of Multicultural Affairs and the Office of International Education. This luncheon was hosted in recognition of International Women’s Day (March 8). Hosted by Dr. Pamela Serota Cote, Director of International Education, the luncheon featured a panel of female international students who discussed their countries’ cultural stances on women’s sexuality. The panelists were Grace Boyle, Alondra Alba, Snigdha Somani, Razan Hamed and Vanessa Mutesi.

Mutesi was the panel’s first speaker. She discussed her home country of Rwanda’s views on female sexuality. She told her audience a humorous anecdote about how she was cautioned against any contact with boys during her childhood and how after her first kiss she returned home in tears convinced that she was pregnant. She then discussed the more conservative social expectations that Rwanda and Africa have for women. She did note the effectiveness of Rwanda’s system of family planning, which has drastically reduced teen pregnancies in the nation.

“Rwanda is a very conservative country. Africa in general is very conservative. So, when it comes to sex… who is sex? What is she?… Women’s sexuality in itself is nonexistent,” said Mutesi.

Next to speak was Grace Boyle. Boyle, a native of Northern Ireland, discussed the taboos surrounding sex. Women’s sexuality is not an open topic in this Catholic country. Boyle also discussed her activism in her homeland as she has been lobbying her government as a student delegate to “Repeal the 8th”, or to make abortion legal in the country.

Snigdha Somani, a freshman from India, spoke next. She discussed the extreme secrecy surrounding female sexuality in India. She spoke about how it was illegal for doctors to reveal the sex of a child before birth as it could lead to the abortion of unborn daughters. Abortion is also illegal in India. She told her listeners about how pharmacists would conceal birth control in several plastic bags in order to protect the woman from discrimination and harassment.

“Women’s sexuality is kept hushed and is almost never talked about,” says Somani.

Alondra Alba discussed sexism on both sides of the southern U.S. border. She discussed the difficulties of getting a sexual education in the “abstinence only” state of Texas. She also talked about how her family’s Catholic faith also limited her sexual knowledge.

The last speaker was Razan Hamed, a sophomore from Palestine. Hamed discussed the patriarchal social structure of Palestine. She talked about how sex was a complete secret. She had no one to educate her. She also talked about the complete dominance that a husband has over his wife and how a married man can force his wife to have sex at his command.

The panel ended on a hopeful note as the panelists recounted stories of progress and how they hoped that soon women would be on the same societal level as men.

RC’s Model Arab League Earns Distinctions at Regional Conference


Written by Jordan Hanson

Last weekend, Roanoke College’s Model Arab League attended the South Eastern Regional Model Arab League (SERMAL) conference in Spartanburg, SC. SERMAL is very similar to the more familiar organization Model United Nations (MUN). However, while MUN has 193 member states, SERMAL focuses solely on the 22 member states that make up the League of Arab States. RC’s delegation represented the nation of Qatar at SERMAL this year.

Though it was only RC’s third year at the conference, the delegation won an award in every committee at the conference. Freshmen Ryan Denholm and Dan Nahor were awarded Superior Delegate (third place) as Heads of State. Freshmen Simon Gardehl and Bradley Sperl were awarded Distinguished Delegate (second place) in Economic Affairs. Freshman Emily Cranford and senior Christa Waterwiese were also awarded second in Joint Defense Council.

Sophomore Casey Wilson was awarded second in Special Council on Women and Children. Seniors Sasha Bronder and Paul Manville placed second in Social Affairs and Political Affairs, respectively. Junior Mia Petrucci and senior Tim Shay were awarded Outstanding Delegate (first place) in Environmental affairs, and sophomore Mary Rose Stark was also awarded first in Palestinian Affairs. As a whole, the delegation was awarded second place overall in the Distinguished Delegation category for their representation of Qatar at the conference.

“SERMAL was an absolute blast! I was really excited to be on the Special Council on Women and Children, thinking about human rights, healthcare, and education problems. It took me a little bit to get used to how things were run, but on the second day we all got down to business and debated and wrote draft resolutions for problems in the Middle East,” said Wilson. With aspirations to work in politics, she added, “It even helped me to see that making legislation is really what I want to do for the rest of my life.”

Brexit: Exploring the UK’s Options


Written by Joey Slusher

Brexit is something everyone has heard of, but a lot of people, particularly us Americans, don’t know a lot about. Brexit refers to The United Kindoms vote to exit the European Union which is a supranational organization that unifies 28 member countries (including but not limited to Germany, France, Spain, Italy, and for now the UK) in one single European market. That means when other countries want to trade with a country in the EU they aren’t making a deal with that country, but with the entirety of the EU. Since 1999 many EU member states have also been using one currency called the Euro which is something the UK opted not to do.

So, Brexit is the British Exit from the EU. The British people voted to leave in 2017 and were given two years to work out a plan with the EU because if they didn’t it would be bad for both parties in a lot of ways. Fast forward to 2019 the year of the deadline for the EU and the UK to figure everything out, and it isn’t looking too good. The EU and the current Prime Minister of the Uk agreed to a plan, and that plan was rejected by the Parliament of the UK, and the EU said that the deal they agreed to was the only deal they would accept and that there would be no negotiations. With that response, the UK voted on a few things. First, they voted whether or not to accept the deal again and Parliament said no, then they voted whether they would accept a No Deal Brexit(meaning they would have to create a new trade deal with the EU over a long period of time costing the UK trillions of dollars and possibly hurting the public), and finally to extend the negotiations process. This is happening all while the opposite party to the Prime Minister’s is trying to undermine everything and hold a new people’s referendum and make Brexit not happen at all.

What do I think is the UK’s best option? Well, and I’m not an economist, and I’m still working on my degree in Poli Sci and IR, but I think they should hold the referendum. Millions of voters back in 2017 didn’t understand the consequences of the vote, and how it would really affect them. With that in mind and the fact, the EU is refusing to budge on negotiations it seems like the UK has been painted into a corner, and can’t find a way out. Even if they could negotiate a deal though, I’m not sure it would hold half the benefits that being in the EU has. Those who voted to leave cited economic and political freedom from EU institutions many of which the UK helped create and held a lot of power over. If they leave the EU it seems to me that the UK would be bending to the will of the EU now more than ever, and could limit their freedom on a much harsher level due to a lack of resources. The coming weeks will make clear where they’re headed, and I have a feeling that whatever happens will set a precedent for future events.