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Dear Sue

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Dear Sue,

I care about someone a lot, and I always want to be there for them, but I feel like in a sense I’m probably bothering them too much. We don’t get to see each other often. We do text but it’s hard for me to decipher their feelings. As their friend I worry about them. They understand my problems more than anyone else, so I feel the need to return the favor. Am I being a little too protective?

-Over Protective Friend

Dear Protective,

It’s great to have a friend that you trust a lot and could always talk to. It can often be hard to confide in people. So, knowing that there is someone out there you can talk to is important. But don’t feel like you’re bothering them too much. If the person is responding to your texts and holding a conversation with you then they obviously want to be talking to you.

If you feel like they’re holding something back, ask them directly about it. Don’t be too pushy but let them know that you’re there as a friend if they ever need someone to talk to. Things may be fine now but life never fails to throw curve balls, and they may need a good friend later.

Now unless you’re constantly asking if everything is alright or threatening anyone who gives them a nasty look, you’re not being too protective. It’s normal to care about someone’s feelings and be worried about them. If they say there’s nothing wrong, trust that they’re being honest with you. You may just be imagining something’s wrong when it really is just nothing.

And don’t forget to let them know how much you appreciate their friendship and how much they mean to you.

~Sue Z. Maroon