Dear Sue: “Considerate Carrie”
I finally have a date for Valentine’s Day this year, but my best friend doesn’t and I can tell that she’s dreading the holiday. I don’t want to ignore her, but my boyfriend has suggested spending the day together in Downtown Roanoke. I was single last Valentine’s Day, so I know how that feels. What should I do?
It’s good to think about your friend, but you also have to think about your boyfriend. Fortunately, you can please both of them. First, ask your boyfriend when he wants to head downtown. You both probably won’t want to bring your best friend with you, and she might not want to come with you, but you can make time to hang out with both of them.
When you’re around your friend, she might ask about your day downtown, but make sure not to talk about it too much. She doesn’t want to know everything. All people are somewhat sensitive, but some people hide their sensitivity more than others. Instead, talk to her about what she wants to talk about. Put things into perspective for her. Valentine’s Day is a single day, and friendships and romantic relationships exist on all days. Sometimes it’s a person’s time to be single, and sometimes they’ll have more social opportunities than others. It’s okay to be alone, even if that day is Valentine’s Day. Without the label, Valentine’s Day is just another day of the week.
So, once you find time to hang out with your friend, what can you do? That’s your choice. Do something you both enjoy. Do something you’d do on a normal day. You don’t have to do anything involving the holiday; that’s okay.
Enjoy your Valentine’s Day Carrie.
Sue Z. Maroon