Written by Joyelle Ronan
If you’re playing the dating game in 2019, it’s likely you have some experience with ghosting. While the term may be new, the practice isn’t. The idea of suddenly cutting off all communication with a person for seemingly no reason could even be chalked up to human nature. People change and grow apart.
While that may be true, it seems like it should be common decency to at least inform the person that your relationship is over. Online communication makes it so easy to cut someone out of your life. Yet, I can’t help but wonder what impact this is having on our communication skills. After filling out a survey where I was asked to rank how likely I was to ghost someone based on a hypothetical situation, I was surprised by my own relationship habits. When did I become so quick to just drop a person from my life? I realized that I was a part of this cultural phenomenon.
Resolved to make a change with my new found enlightenment, I decided to reach out to a former fling. Our story was typical: we met in a cute way, went on a couple of dates, texted daily, and then we just abruptly ended it. I left him on read a few times and he stopped answering my texts and just like that, our few months of talking were over. It had been about a month since we ceased contact and I still felt weird about it. So, I decided to message him. I explained how I felt about the situation. He messaged me back and told me he really appreciated that I had reached out to him. We even agreed on being friends! Now I have closure and can watch his instagram story completely guilt free. It may seem easier to just ignore people, but consider the fact that this person is taking the time to reach out to you. If it’s a relationship that you’re really not feeling, kindly let them know that it’s not going to work out. If it’s a friendship, give them another chance or explain why you don’t want to hang out with them. I think we could all benefit from a little more communication in our lives. So, next time you’re tempted to leave someone in your life on read, remember that people as a whole tend to be good and being vulnerable isn’t as scary as it seems.