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MEN: If You Knew Better, You’d Do Better


Written by Shamira James

In my 22 years (gross, I’m old), I’ve heard a lot of arguments. I’ve heard people argue if water is wet, if the world is flat and who is the worst, men or women. All of my guy friends often say girls are manipulative, emotional and confusing.

Call me biased, but I’m calling BS. I just really don’t feel like guys see the full picture. They say men have selective hearing, and I think they have selective attention too. Trust me buddy, there are definitely two sides to every story, and it’s about time you pulled your big boy head from your big boy nether-regions and realize YOU’RE BEING A JACKASS.

Sure, (one of) the girl(s) you’re talking to is asking questions, “cornering” you, or she has another motive behind what she actually says, but did you ever stop to think (the answer is no because the times when you actually use your mind are few and far between) that the reason girls have to try and finesse an answer out of you is because YOU ARE PLAYING GAMES?

I promise you, all anyone wants is the truth: the truth about what you want, the truth about what “this” is, the truth about just exactly who that girl is you’re always texting, but you swear it’s nothing. If you were just a man, for one, and not a coward, she wouldn’t have to be as “manipulative” as you think.

It’s completely normal to have emotions and yes, girls experience emotions to the hundredth degree but that’s just because we’re passionate by nature. When we feel, we feel deeply. Boys are agitators, it’s in your blood, you push people because you want to know your limits. Boys literally love a challenge, so then by that logic, you truly have no place when you push a girl to her – no wait, PAST her limit. Calling her a crazy liar when she knew the truth literally the entire time is such a dick move.

Guys calling girls confusing is the biggest pot and kettle situation of the ages. People are confusing by nature, the element of surprise is basically a survival skill. I won’t disagree with this but I’ve have never, and I mean ever in all of my sun Capricorn, moon Scorpio, rising Taurus life, met a boy who was straight-up with a girl. He might tell his boys what he wants with a girl, but he will have that girl out here like Boo Boo the Fool all because he won’t cut her off, but GOD forbid she goes ghost for a week, then all of sudden, she can’t fend him off with a stick. You either want her or you don’t YOU CANNOT HAVE IT BOTH WAYS.

So what’s the point of all of this? Why am I sitting here essentially doing a longform Twitter rant? Because this a WAKEUP CALL to all college-age men. You all think you’re so untouchable right now and why wouldn’t you? You’re at your most charming, most attractive and even most sexually active period of your life. But I have a newsflash for you buddy, it won’t last forever.

Just how long do you think you can go around being this damn inconsiderate and oblivious? I’m trying to do something your friends, teammates, brothers and whoever else won’t do: I’m calling you out. There’s no more excuses for your behavior. You either shape and do right, or you stay a sad little shell of a man, the choice is yours. If you knew better, you would do better.